Title: Timeless: A Sensual Time Travel Adventure
Author: Michael War
Length: 3,300 words
Publisher: Self Published
Genre: m/m time travel romance
Rating: D+
Blurb:
After dumping his intelligent but bland boyfriend, lonely scientist Marcus ventures into Earth’s prehistoric past to find the next big discovery. But instead of science, Marcus unearths passion courtesy of an exotic caveman who rescues him from danger and fulfills his deepest fantasies.
Around 3,300 words, this gay erotic short story is the perfect backdrop for any person’s (or couple’s) imagination.
Review:
This story is from a new author attempting to break into the gay erotica through self publishing. I’m a fan of time travel stories and so I was happy to pick this up for review. The initial premise of the story has merit and follow scientist Marcus, who along with his ex-lover, has produced a time travel device in the form of a bracelet. Marcus has recently broken up with Daniel because he found their love life boring, but a trip to prehistory shows him what he’s been missing in the form of a liaison with a caveman.
The main part of the story was pretty good. It’s focused on two sex scenes, one a flashback between Marcus and Daniel and the second between Marcus and the caveman. Both are hot and well written, just the ticket if you are looking for a piece of steamy erotica. I particularly liked the contrast between the sensual and loving scene between Marcus and Daniel and the rough but more exciting sex with the caveman.
Having said that, I felt a little like I was missing out on quite a number of the science fiction details about how the time travel works, the function of the bracelet and the effects of the travel in terms of changing history. These were either ignored or swept aside in favour of the sex. This gave the story more of the feel of a porn film, where the sex becomes the focus and the lead up is a mere formality before getting onto the sex, rather than a carefully plotted piece of erotic writing. If that’s all OK with you as a reader then you may well not be as disappointed as I was with the lack of detail in the setting.
My main niggle though, and one that brought the grade down into the D’s, was that this read like the first draft of a story. There were a number of editing errors, including changing from the past to the present tense for no reason, which pulled me out of the story. The story needs a thorough read through from a proof-reader other than the author before selling it as product, even if it’s only $0.99.
The beauty of self-publishing means that mistakes can be changed though and this story shows some promise, as does the author’s writing. However, I’m reviewing this as a published piece of work and as such I can’t recommend it in its current form.
Oh. My. I’ll pass!
On the plus side, that’s Too-Smooth Guy on the cover, so you’ll perhaps see this cover again in a future Misadventure.
I shall look forward to seeing what you can do with the title, Chris
.
Just wanted to stop by and say thanks for the review. Though naturally I would have hoped for a higher grade, I appreciate the constructive criticism (as well as the kind words) and will use that in any future works that I publish.
Hi Michael. Thanks for stopping by. Good luck with future releases!
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